How to cope with the emotional stress of a negative pregnancy result

When women try to conceive, most expect to get pregnant. It can, therefore, be a shock to the system when pregnancy tests come back negative, month after month. You can worry that you’ll never get pregnant and will never be able to have a child of your own. It’s a serious concern.

Dealing with these emotions – especially anxiety – can be a challenge. You can get to the point where you don’t even want to take pregnancy tests anymore because of the risk that they will come back negative. It can make it difficult to cope.

Fortunately, there are all kinds of ways to deal with the emotional stress that comes with a negative pregnancy result. Here are some of the strategies that you might want to try.

Ask Yourself Whether You Could Still Be Pregnant Anyway

When the pregnancy test comes back negative, it can be tempting to throw your hands up in the air and conclude that you’re not pregnant and you’re never going to be pregnant. That’s just human nature.

Pregnancy tests, however, are not infallible. They CAN be wrong from time to time.

Suppose, for instance, that you take a test and it comes back negative but your period does not arrive, even after several weeks. In this case, it is worth taking another test to see if the first one produced an accurate reading. You could still be pregnant. Furthermore, if your period did arrive on schedule, it doesn’t automatically mean that you’re not pregnant, though it is unlikely. It may be worth just checking one more time with a new test kit to make sure.

You could also have taken your test too early. Most tests advise you to take a pregnancy test on or before the day of your expected period. These kits measure the level of the hormone hCG, which builds up following the fertilisation of the egg. This increase in the hormone, however, can take several days, even weeks, to occur. So if you test for pregnancy too early, the kit may not pick up on these changes.

Don’t Allow Your Imagination To Run Wild

If you’re prone to anxiety and worry, it can be tempting to put your own (usually negative) spin on a negative test result. If it tells you that you’re “not pregnant” then you might automatically infer things that aren’t true.

There could be all sorts of reasons why you’re not pregnant right now. There’s very little that you can say about your long term chances of conceiving without a full medical investigation.

Don’t automatically conclude that you’re a “failure.” Failing a pregnancy test has nothing to do with failing a test at school, even though it might seem like it.

Also, don’t tell yourself you’ll never get pregnant. With the range of modern treatments available today, you almost always have options.

If you have tried a range of treatments to get pregnant, but none of them has worked, don’t conclude they won’t work in the future. Often it takes three or four trials of the same treatment to become pregnant.

Of course, for some people fertility is not possible – this is an unfortunate reality of life. But even if you find yourself in this position, it doesn’t mean that you can never be a parent. You can still adopt. There’s a tremendous need out there.

What To Do If Your Pregnancy Comes Back Negative – Checklist

  • Give yourself some time and space. Getting a negative test result can be a massive knock to your emotions. Suddenly, you begin to fear that you might not be able to complete the important life milestone of having a child. Take some time to yourself and allow yourself to feel whatever emotions you have. Try not to bottle them up. Tell a friend or talk to your partner if you need to.
  • Take the “wait and see” approach. Remember, even if the test comes back negative, it doesn’t mean that you’re not pregnant this cycle. You could be one of those women whose hormones take time to ramp up.
  • Separate fact from fiction. Don’t say things that are false such as “I can never be a parent” or “I am a failure.” These aren’t true.
  • Continue living your life to the full. Even if you don’t get pregnant on your current cycle, it doesn’t mean that you have to put your life on hold.

If you’re struggling with the emotional stress of a negative pregnancy result, make sure that you search for fertility clinics so that you can discuss your situation and options with a specialist.


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